By Shaykh Sulaiman Moola

Houses are built of brick and stone, but homes are made of love alone.
Home is where you hang your “heart” and where the small are great and the great are small.

The Messenger (peace and blessings upon him) has said, “Control your tongue, let your house accommodate you and lament your sins.”

In the previous times, couples did not have a house nor a home at the inception of marriage, but mutual love and commitment got them both, while the average couple today commences life with a palatial house and they are expected to make a home only, but sadly few accomplish it.

One of the finest examples to cite, of a home, is that of Abū Talha (may Allāh be pleased with him) and his wife Umm Sulaym (may Allāh be pleased with her).

Allāh Almighty had blessed the union with a child, which is a definite source of joy and happiness. Fate and destiny had it such that the little boy took ill. His dad (Abū Tālha) was out for some work. By the will of Allāh, the little boy passed away.

Umm Sulaym (may Allāh be pleased with her) bathed her deceased son, wrapped him in a “Kafn” (shroud of white cloth) and patiently endured the will of Almighty Allāh. She then told the other members of the family, “Do not tell Abū Talha about the death of his son. Rather, I will convey it to him at the appropriate time.”

Subsequently, Abū Talha returns “Home”.
He enquired from his wife regarding the wellbeing of the little boy. The reply of this woman was most amazing. She said, “He is more peaceful than what he was”.

Allāhu Akbar! What an amazing woman and what a diplomatic reply!

Nowadays we talk about psychology, sensitivity, euphemism etc. but seldom do we walk the talk. This woman (Umm Sulaym) said it all in one statement. Without alarming her husband, or speaking a lie, she navigated wisely through the crisis. He on the other hand, assumed “peaceful” to mean, recovery and recuperation, but alas the little boy had moved on in to the mercy of Allāh. She then provided food for her partner, after which she adorned herself. The couple then met in seclusion and had relationship. The narration further goes on to say, when she realised that her husband was relaxed and composed, she whispered to him, “O my hubby, can I please ask you a question?”
“Yes indeed”, was the reply.
She asked, “If somebody lends you an article for a period of time and the duration expires, can you withold the item?” He obviously replied in the negative, but couldn’t understand the relevance of the question at this juncture.
With a tear in her eye and a crack in her voice, she said, “Almighty Allāh had lent us our lad for a period of time and the duration has certainly expired, hence he has returned to Allāh.”

‎إِنَّا لِلّهِ وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعونَ

‘To Allāh we belong and to Him shall we return’

He broke down, sobbing away. She comforted and consoled him and together they healed each other.

Allāhu Akbar (Allāh is the Greatest)

This indeed is a home.
This is what the Qur’ān refers to as a place of comfort.

On the reverse of that, is our pitiful state.
Sadly, we have taken every possible step to enhance the comfort of our dwellings but have done very little to transform the house in to a “Home”.

Instead of planning your next holiday, perhaps it is time to design a “Home” you do not want to flee from.